What Is the Person I Am Meant to Become in Retirement?
The person you are meant to become is not a distant stranger waiting in the future; they are a version of you that already exists in your imagination, waiting to be embodied through action. This concept, rooted in the psychological theory of “possible selves,” suggests that your aspirations and fears about the future directly influence your current motivation and behaviour. For those in retirement, this is the perfect opportunity to define and live into that aspirational identity.
Why Should You Live the Life of That Person Every Day, Even If You Aren’t There Yet?
You should live the life of that person every single day because the gap between your current self and your ideal self is bridged by the practice of “acting as if.” The phrase “fake it till you make it” is not about deception; it’s a practical application of neuroplasticity, allowing your brain to rewire itself through consistent behaviour. William James, a highly influential philosopher, noted, “If you want a quality, act ‘as if’ you already had it” . By embodying the confident, engaged retiree you wish to be, you are accelerating that identity integration.
- Neuroplasticity in Action: Your brain creates new neural pathways when you consistently act in a certain way. The more you show up as your future self, the more natural it becomes .
- The Feedback Loop: Actions influence emotions as much as emotions influence actions. A forced smile can trigger a happier mood . The physical state of your body can directly impact your mood and cognition; for instance, raising your spine and holding your head up can lead to a boost in self-confidence .
- Closing the Gap: As one executive coach noted, high performers consciously imagine their ideal future self’s reactions, tone, and attitude before the moment arrives. These future qualities act as an anchor, reducing burnout and increasing joy . One professional who adopted this strategy reported that within a month of consciously presenting as “cool, calm, and collected,” he stopped performing and started being .
How Does the “Possible Selves” Theory Support This Claim?
The “possible selves” theory provides the academic backbone for this mindset, showing that your vision of who you could become is a powerful motivator. According to this theory, individuals are driven to take actions that either move them toward their “ideal self” (a positive image worth pursuing) or away from their “feared self” (a negative image to be avoided) . In the context of retirement, this means that if you want to be an active, connected, and purposeful individual, you must create a vivid, detailed version of that self and take steps to live into it.
Research has found that informal learning accounts for 80% of personal knowledge and skills acquisition . For retirees, this means the vast majority of your growth comes from self-directed activities.
- Fact 1: Your brain often cannot distinguish between a vividly imagined experience and a real one . This is why visualization is so powerful in rewiring limiting beliefs.
- Fact 2: The Reticular Activating System (RAS) in your brain filters information based on your goals. When you act “as if,” you engage the RAS to notice opportunities that align with your aspirational identity .
- Fact 3: According to research on “possible selves,” those who clearly express their future self-images are more inclined to implement the tactics needed to realize their goals .
What Are the Practical Steps to Embodying Your Ideal Retired Self?
Embodying your ideal retired self involves practical, daily habits that reinforce your new identity. You can start by defining three aspirational words that capture your best future self and setting them as reminders on your phone or calendar . This simple habit creates a “check-in” to ensure your actions align with the person you are becoming.
- Dress the Part: Show up to your day dressed like the person you want to become. As one expert put it, “Energy matters” .
- Take Brave Action Daily: As Franklin D. Roosevelt famously said, “Do the thing and you will have the power.” Power and confidence follow action, not the other way around . Don’t wait to feel ready; build confidence through momentum.
- Journal from the Future: Write from the perspective of the version of you who has already “made it.” What are they doing? What do they feel? What are they grateful for? .
- Use the “Best Possible Self” Exercise: Write for 20 minutes, three days in a row, about what your life will look like in several years if everything goes as well as possible. This has been shown to improve mood for up to three weeks .
- Make a Pact: Commit to acting enthusiastic for 30 days. Track your mood, relationships, and productivity as enthusiasm goes from something you force to a habit that feels real .
What Role Does the CheeringUp.info Retirement Club Play in This Transformation?
The CheeringUp.info Retirement Club is your community for this transformation, providing a supportive environment to share your journey and find inspiration. Our online retirement club for over-55s in the UK helps you connect with like-minded people who are also actively designing their best retired lives. By engaging with our community, you are “surrounding yourself with evidence” that your vision is achievable .
- Connect with Others: Join clubs, groups, or classes to meet new people and avoid isolation. The CheeringUp.info Retirement Club offers opportunities for online and face-to-face activities, day trips, and active retirement ideas .
- Give Back and Share Your Wisdom: Retirement is an opportunity to use your talents, knowledge, and resources to help others, which is a fulfilling way to give back. Share your experiences and mentor others in the CheeringUp.info Retirement Club.
- Redefine Your Purpose: Redefining your identity is not just about reflection; it’s about exploration. The CheeringUp.info Retirement Club provides a space to explore new hobbies, volunteer opportunities, and social connections.
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The Person You Are: How to Live the Life of That Person Every Day